A blog or two ago I said, "you don't know how crazy your life is, until it isn't crazy anymore." It's true. Sort of.
I'm still getting used to the absence of crazy.
Like......
Every morning I open the pantry in the kitchen and fight the urge to reach up and grab the Grape-Nuts box to make cereal for Mom.
Like....
Every time I walk past Mom's bathroom, with all of her medications lined up in their color-coded rows, I think, "I should check to see which ones need to be refilled."
Like....
Two o'clock comes and for just a moment, I think I need to give Mom her oxycodones.
Like.....
Every time I sit down to relax, I keep expecting, assuming even, that something will happen to prevent me from doing anything BUT relax.
Like.....
I can't get over the fact that I haven't been to a grocery store in.......well, that's just it......I honestly don't remember the last time. No more early morning/late night runs to QFC or Safeway for cottage cheese with chives, or Mocha Mix, or fruit cocktail, or Campbell's chicken noodle soup, or........wait for it.........BANANYAS!!
Like......
I caught a "bug" two days ago. Now, this is really unusual because the last time I caught a bug like this one, was about thirteen years ago after I had had fried razor clams at Camp 99 outside of Portland, Oregon. I knew I had caught a "bug" because around 1am, my body became suddenly decided it had a mission--to expel, by any means possible, any (A N Y), digested or undigested, filtered or unfiltered, absorbed or unabsorbed matter that happened to be residing anywhere (A N Y W H E R E) between my face and my......well, the other end. In short, my gastrointestinal tract spent a good six to seven hours evacuating its contents.
(I'm sorry. Was that too much detail?)
Anyway..........I caught this bug, see, and............well, the really glorious thing was that.......the next day.......I just did nothing. NOTHING. I barely spoke. I didn't get dressed. Criminy, I didn't even make my bed! In fact, (you won't believe this)......I took.........are you ready for it?...........a NAP. Yessirree, I did. I. Took. A. Nap. Right smack dab in the middle of the afternoon. Recovered from "the bug" in a day and a half, thank you very much.
Like.....
That constant feeling that some type of crisis is always lurking behind the next minute......is gone.
Like.....
Right now, I'm sitting in the living room typing this, and it's almost eleven in the morning, and it's really, really quiet and really, really still in the house and.........and.......and.....I think to myself, I could like.....sit here for as long as I want to and type, or read, or watch the snow (yes it's snowing in Sequim this morning), or do nothing, yesssirree I could just that, I could do nothing if I wanted! Hahahah! Nothing!!
Sorry.......getting a little crazy......
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