Duck Tape

I've never been exactly sure what it is. Is it duct tape or duck tape? Or are they both correct? I dunno. In any case, I'm assuming everyone knows what I'm talking about. That stuff McGyver uses to save the world, or, in my father's case, what he uses to keep his shoes from falling apart.

See, my Dad has this favorite pair of boots--they're sort of like Uggs. I think. And I'm sure they were lovely, once. Currently however, their original color is entirely up for grabs. Gray? Brown? Or, god forbid, white??? ew. But, whatever. The color is irrelevant to Dad, since he's lost half his vision and fashion has never been his strongpoint. (Good grief, it took him until he turned 70 to wear anything but white shirts!)

Dad wears his boots-of-a-color-that-shall-not-be-named everywhere. HAS worn them everywhere for years. And this is because Dad is not one to get rid of clothing he likes (hence the tattered sleeves and collar of all his beloved Land's End rugby shirts). As a result, the beforementioned boots have developed little holes in them exactly on the places that coverDad's fungus-eaten big toes (And that reminds me. What is UP with old people and their toes?! Okay, okay. That'll have to wait for a different blog. Stay tuned. I'll call that one Toe Jam. Watch for it.). And rather than invest in a pair of new boots (whose color would be instantly recognizable), he continues to patch up those big-toe-holes with duct (or was it duck? Did we decide?) tape. My brother even got Dad a new pair of Uggs two xmases ago. They're still sitting in Dad's closet! With no duck-duct tape on them!

But Dad doesn't stop with taping his boots together. He uses duct-duck-goose tape to fix practically anything. It's like in My Big Fat Greek Wedding--the Dad that heals everything with Windex!

So, that's really it for today. For some reason, the ever-present vision of those little silver-gray patches of tape on the toes of my dad's boots was burning a hole in my brain. Gosh, if only I could use quacker-tape on my brain.