Where's the Floppy Hat Man When I Need Him?

I watched a documentary the other night about Buddha. I'm not a religious person by any stretch of anybody's imagination, but I've been on a documentary kick lately--like I'm craving reality, facts, historical accounts. Go figure.

Anyway, there was this one part in the Buddha doc that talked about how Buddha spent x-number of years wandering around the jungle, or the forest, or the desert, trying to seek enlightenment, or the secret of enlightenment. What he discovered, and this is the statement that stuck with me, is that "enlightenment is in the moment."

This is not an unfamiliar concept--the idea of "being in the moment," "savoring the moment," "nirvana is now" (okay, I just made that one up, but you get the point.) For some reason, the way the statement was made in the documentary, coupled with the mood I've been in lately....it just had an affect on me. "Enlightenment is in the moment."

Then I reflected. I started reflecting a lot. Like.....about how angry I've been for the past several years. Like how.....I haven't been finding much enlightenment anywhere.

Then, I started having a bonafide "moment" of my own. You know how there are those life-changing moments in your life? This was one of them for me.

I put the documentary on Pause.

I thought to myself, "Okay, I'm tired of waiting for things to get better. I'm tired of waiting for when I'll be happy again."

I said to myself, "I want my 'better' to be right now. I want 'happy' to be right now. I want my enlightenment to be right now."

Then I asked myself, "What is my moment right now?"

I listened. All I could hear in the entire house was the gentle snoring of Emily, the bulldog, and soft breathing of Uma, the cocker. And I thought, "Enlightenment doesn't get much better than this." How perfect is that.

But wait, there's more...........

The next day, I decided to go for my usual 6 mile walk. This time, though, I decided I would walk with my new mantra in my head--Enlightenment in every moment, Enlightenment in every moment, Enlightenment in every moment....

This is big.

See, in the past, my typical walk looked like this--Me with my dark glasses on (so nobody could see my eyes); Me walking at a brisk, destination-oriented-do-NOT-get-in-my-way 4mph; Me with my iPod earbuds in; Me purposely NOT making any connection with anybody on the trail--NOT the annoying Audobon birdwatchers who inevitably ALWAYS blocked the trail but who always cheerfully said hello to me as I quickly power-walked by them in silence without acknowledging their presence (see, I told you I've been angry); NOT the ridiculous elderly gentleman with the floppy hap who regularly walks the trail and who voluntarily and unsolicitously comes up to me from time to time, chirps out a Good Morning, and then asks if I'd like him to join me on my walk even though I always firmly say No and keep moving past him while maintaining my 4mph pace; NOT the perky Eagle Lady who uses the trail to ride her bicycle out to the Eagle Tree to see if the bald eagles are perched at the top of the tree and who never fails to try and engage me in a running dialogue about how she has "ridden her bicycle all the way out to the Eagle Tree to see if any eagles are perched in the tree" and did I know that actual bald eagles perch in "that big tall tree down the trail" and have I seen any eagles today??? (Yah. I ignored her too.)

This was different. On this day, I walked with NO sunglasses and NO earbuds. Just me listening to every moment, and thinking over and over in my head, "Enlightenment in every moment, enlightenment in every moment." The first mile down my street was magnificent. Truly. Asphalt never felt so good.

Then, I made the transition onto the Discovery Trail. I passed several other trail-goers. I smiled (yes I really did). I actually even said, "How are you today?" to a few. It was pretty magnificent. For the first time in a long time, I was walking NOT to escape the world. I was walking.......to be part of the world. Armed with my renewed sense of being part of the the world, all I could think of was, "Bring on the Eagle Lady! Bring on the annoying Audobon Birdwatchers! Bring on the Floppy Hat Man!

Well.....I'm sorry to report that the birdwatchers were not out, the Eagle Lady was obviously doing something else, and the Floppy Hat Man never appeared. BUT.........did I let that deter me???

Oh no, no, no, no! I did manage to have a very pleasant exchange with a slightly muddy but sweet-faced elderly golden retriever. We made plans.