Toe Spacers and Apple Jack Brandy Cake

I know, I know..........no posts for too long, what's going on, where ya been, it's about time, etc. Yeah I know! It's been forever since I've posted a new blog about, well you know. Here I am nevertheless. Back at it. It's Christmas the day after tomorrow. I figured it was time.
Not much has changed. Dad still sings in the morning, loves food, absorbs the news, drives me crazy asking me the same thing all the time. His hearing is worse, his sight is just as bad, and his mobility continues to decline, just as he keeps reminding me it will do.
Mom still sits in her or lies in her bed and stares at the television, CNN to be exact. She still has her "down days" about once a month and her short term memory is worse.
And speaking of Mom, let's get to tonight's blog.
It's the holidays yes? The time when catalogs are more like telephone books than catalogs. From November through January, half of our paper recycle bin is catalogs. Regardless of the time of year, I purposely do NOT let my mother get her hands on catalogs. Once in a while I pass on one Land's End, or one Eddie Bauer, or, her favorite, The Vermont Country Store catalog. But that's it. She's especially dangerous during the holidays because she picks up the phone and orders random things--coffee cup warms, pineapple peelers, onion mits. I ask you.............onion mits???
And for the life of me, I'm amazed that anybody can understand her on the phone when she does call in an order. But somehow, they do, and random stuff arrives at the front door.
Apparently this year mom was inspired again. Tonight I returned home to find a large box at the front door. It's addressed to my mom. The box has the "Vermont Country Store" label on the outside. Uh oh. This can't be good, I think to myself. What has Mom ordered now?
I couldn't stand the anticipation so I opened the box.
As you probably guessed from the blog's title, there were two items in the box--Apple Jack Brandy Cake and.................Toe Spacers. Toe Spacers, you ask? Yes. Toe S p a c e r s. And you may think toe spacers are pretty odd things to order. But you haven't seen my mother's toes.
Imagine a jigsaw puzzle of a foot with each toe a separate piece of the puzzle. Now imagine you give those puzzle pieces to a baby and let them try to put the toe pieces together. The result is what my mother's feet look like--toes starting from and pointing in directions that make no anatomical sense. So......toe spacers actually make a lot of sense.
The Apple Jack Brandy Cake, on the other hand, has me stumped. I can't wait to hear her explain why she felt we needed to have Apple Jack Brandy Cake. We have fruitcake, truffles, double-dipped graham crackers, pistachios, eggnog, assorted chocolates, and a variety of holiday cookies.
I suppose it isn't important why Mom ordered cake and toe spacers. It makes her happy. And as long as she isn't ordering a motorized Ferrari from Hammacher Schlemmer, what harm can it do, right? Yeah right.
Maybe I'll celebrate Christmas Eve tomorrow with a slice of Apple Jack Brandy Cake. Merry ho ho!